Realize

Take time to realize that your warmth is crashing down on in.
Take time to realize that I am on your side. 
Didn't I, didn't I tell you?
But I can't spell it out for you.
No, it's never gonna be that simple.
No, I can't spell it out for you.

-Colbie Caillat

i love this song. i know it's probably about a girl and a guy, but what i see is something different.
twisting the words a bit, the song talks about realizing that the friends you have are there for a reason.
i have this friend.
she had a very bad past, in the category of doing things she knows is wrong, yet continually doing them.
i guess things like that can just become addicting.
anyway, all of this happened before we were friends.
when i met Sally*, she was a hard-hearted girl who did what she wanted, when she wanted, with who she wanted.
being naive to the new world of Tennessee, i was deceived for a while by her outward appearance,
but soon became aware of what i was dealing with.
over the months of hanging out, going to movies, and just talking on the phone, Sally started changing.
i'm not sure if i was the influence she needed, but i definitely saw a change.
she stopped her bad habits, she turned from her old, destructive ways,
and became an all-around better girl.
we continued to grow closer and closer over time, until something over the past 2 months changed it all.
three bad influences entered Sally's life; and it seemed as if she was about to turn into the old girl that
i met 2 years prior.
i could see it building, waiting for the moment she'd snap.
giving her advice every day,
strongly suggesting her to stay away from these three bad influences,
i began wondering why she still thought it was humorous and "no big deal."
one day, i asked.
"why don't you listen to me? why don't you just take my advice. you should know that i have a clue what i'm
talking about, because i've gone through something similar."
in response, Sally laughed and said,
"i don't know, it'll be fine!"
now, i remember my thoughts when Sally told me something Laura* had said to her,
about the same thing,
saying that Sally should be careful and stay away from these bad influences...
i laughed at the thought, then.
now i realize how right Laura was.
i guess sometimes we just have to take to heart how serious things can be,
and that if we have good friends,
we have to know they care about us
and just realize that what we have isn't just there for fun,
but that our friends really are on our side.


p.s. merry christmas:]

*some names have been changed. 

BFF...literally.

how many times have you told your best friend, "bFF!" ?
now, do you really think you and that friend will seriously stick together through highschool,
college,
and the rest of your lives,
being "BFF"?
i know it makes you feel better about you and your friend's relationship if you say bff,
but very rarely do highschool bff's stay bff's 'forever'.
in my case,
this is different.
me and my several bff's have gone through so much together,
i don't think anything could break us up...
other than one of us dying.
but if that happened, the other would prolly kill themselves,
therefore being reunited in heaven once again, to be best friends
forever.
my friends and i have endured:

short and long fights,
the pressure of parents resisting our friendship,
boys, (oh...so many boys.)
and last but not least,
the struggle of moving far, far away, and trying to keep communication through IM, phone, and an occassional 'fune letter'. :] now, i seriously doubt the number of friendships like mine and my bff's is high. because most in our position would've failed a while ago. i know i've lost touch with many ''bffs'' that i had back in middle school before i moved, and now i don't even have their numbers even if i wanted to drop in. i'm very thankful for my best friends, and i have a strong hope that our relationships stay how they are, get even better, and surely don't fail like many before. i love you, bff. <3 i'll never forget you, and i promise we'll be bff, forever. :] AS&CB.bff<3

Another Funeral...

so there are two things that can make a day the worst day of a girl's life.
one: the day 'the one' breaks up with you, and
two: the day your first cell phone dies.
i don't have a boyfriend, so luckily it's not the first one.
but it is true, my cell phone died today, September 21st, 2007 at around 6pm.
i cried for hours, mourning the loss of not only my first cell phone,
but of the loss of the 400+ pictures i had on there that are now lost forever.
although brothers and my dad laughed at my sorrow,
i truely felt the need to cry.
i didn't do it on purpose,
but my cell phone was definitely without a doubt my best non-human friend.
we went everywhere together,
experienced way too many concerts,
took wayyy too many pictures,
sent millions of text messages,
and definitely spent over 1,000,000 minutes next to eachother's faces throughout the days and nights.
i know it's just one of many for sure,
but it's always a tragedy when the first one bites the dust.
i'm gonna miss my little [well, not so little] first celly,
and i will definitely never forget her. :[
<33

Yearbooks

i'm sick.
:[
school was good, we got our yearbooks from last year.
i got a few signatures, but i've noticed that in the south people don't write huge long stories in your yearbook...
when you say 'sign my book' they really just sign their name.
and nothing else.
i guess it's okay, but i like having a lot of memories and stories written in my yearbook.
when i write in other's yearbooks i write novels!
it's just different i guess.
just one of the infinite differences between the north and south.
while i was having people sign my book, i started to remember last year and how different it is now from then.
i had barely any friends, since i just moved here,
i was much more shy,
and i definitely cared more about what i wore to school.
now it doesn't matter as much, though i still take an hour to get ready each morning,
but now that i know people and they know me,
they won't judge me for how i look.
[though i still won't go without make-up like some of my friends.]
i'm glad we moved here, but i still miss the big apple.
my family,
my best friends,
and the memories still exist,
but it's always nice to go back and remember all the good times.
i guess yearbooks have made me realize to always savor the good times,
side-step the bad,
and live life to the fullest.
:]

Summer's End

so hey.
today was cool.
my dad, basegasket, told me about this blog site and i decided it wouldn't be a bad idea to get one.
i've read his blogs, they're pretty awesome.
mine prolly won't be as complicated and interesting as his YET, since i'm just learning about this site.
not to brag, but i'm smarter than him in the computers department. [in most cases, anyway.]
:]
anyway, i've been noticing the change from summer to fall.
my birthday plans are beginning to finally fall into place [only 10 days away!],
the weather [jeep rides to school each morning are brisker and we turn the heat on now],
football games [getting painted up and losing my voice every friday night],
and midterms...
they come out soon, but i think chemistry is the only class that i'm really sucking at.
i had a test today and i'm pretty sure i failed it.
i already have a 72% in that class... it's hard.
one of my old friends said he'd help me if i ever needed a tutor,
but the thing is that i feel like i understand it,
then i do horribly on the quizzes/tests.
it's weird.
to the maxx.
anyway,
i guess this is a long enough post for today.
:]